oh ere we go

It seams like its been an age since my last shed time, oh how I missed Percy the spider and the continuous bashing of my head on those bloody roof beams. It was the sickness you see which kept me from the shed, the sickness that is DIY. When the boss decided it was time to decorate my little heart dropped. Off to B&Q; Paint, brushes, picture frames and the likes. I'm naff at painting, my theory is get paint, fill up tray get roller...Go! as fast as you can, the quicker you roll the quicker it gets done. This was my fatal flaw. Not the crap paint job it was the mountains of splatters and drips of paint. Well that was how it was in the flat but now we is grown ups and as such we have a house and I am banned from using the roller. Its paintbrush for me. Its the same punishment naughty soldiers get when they clean the bogs with tooth brushes. And its all my fault for rushing. To cut a long rant short I'm back in the shed. for my troubles the boss got me a huge extension cable (To contain my racket!) but this means no more leaning out the kitchen window to grind. First thing is sanding the old front forks back. Rough forks, sand paper, how hard can that be? Actually very hard so off to a friends grab a electric sander and back in the shed; for the record it took bloody ages and I still only got one finished.

Its looking pretty good I think, But I will probably paint them once the second fork is done.
So next job was some spacers for the rear wheel. Got on the phone to my Dad for some steel tubing and away we go (actually I'd call him a few days before in pre shed planning). The axel holes in the frame are 20mm and the axel I have in the wheel is 15mm so I had a bit of jiggery pokery to do, out comes the trusty grinder AND the gloves; safety first, oh yeah. a short while laters every thing almost fits so a little test and low and behold its wrong, not wide enough, so its start from scratch. It wouldn't be so bad, apart from the sawing. oh its a killer but I'm sure my Grandad said its character building. Now they are longer shinny and most importantly the rear wheel now fits nice and snug and can be done up for the first time ever. Wheel the bike out sporting a front wheel and a back wheel all attached.

As I mentioned before, I'm not so good with the electrics so some research was done in the office the other day (hell yeah, it was definatly in my lunch break, pre lunch break, well just before tea break) any way I was reading some hints on electrics from this link
http://www.dirtybobbers.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=2557.0
And it was really helpful. I don't have a soldering iron or other bits so for the time being I was just laying it out with what I have. Its not easy. Really not easy. I got and old electricians project box to hide some of the bits and bobs in. I put the indicator relay and the condenser and some of the bulkier cable in it. I cut some in/out holes in it and also a hole for the battery cables to come out of and I also attached the rectifier to the lid. I got the collection of mini toggle switches and button switches the eBay has sent me and tried to figure out where best to have them. I have decided to have then between my legs by the front seat mount but need a plate welded to the frame to house then but as I didn't have and steel or know how to weld (Yet) I zip tied some ali in place for a make shift plate (fear not I put in a request with pops for some steel off cuts, his gaffer must be awful lovely keep donating steel to my noble cause) I got it all together as best as possible. I do have some questions though.
1st. Do I need a main beam light?
2nd. Do I need a rev counter?
3rd. Is it stupid off me to not have an oil warning light?

I have also been filling, sanding and painting the tank. This task I have been repeating and then repeating and then repeating. I used to watch tomorrows world and I never saw the robots at the beginning on the production line spraying and filling and then doing it all over again. The cheats! Everyone is like yeah painting is the easy bit, just fill it sand it and spray it, bugger that! I've filled and sanded about 4 times now and I'm out of filler, I only brought a small tube, that's false economy that is

Mounts away

My Mounts are made, in draft form only, not really sure how or what to do to them to make then look a bit better but they serve their purpose for now even if they are ugly.
I really feel good about this my soft office hands are now scared with the mark of real work. The frame is taking shape and its time to spend some of the eBay momey from the CB. So I get s sheet of Aluminum, switches, a green light for me neutral, zip ties, heat shrink and 20 meters of colured wire.
of course the wire is to thin so i have to then buy more, the heat shrinks are to thin and my lovely new grinder chews up the aluminum. gheees!!
I have to cut my seat pad from the aluminum the old fashined way; by hand. The sun is shinning, the boss is doing the gardening and after 3 hours of sawing and filing in the sweating sun. I give up! have a drink wish i still smoked then cracked on and finished my seat pan. I wish, I wish I had just spent some money and brought one. It was not a labour of love, it killed me
I now have a frame with engine, the wheels fit, the electrics are in a collection of jiffy bags awaiting stuff, the seat is cut out. Problem! how to I shape the seat, or even just put a bend in it so i don't slide in to the wheel and rip the skin from my ass. P.s that problem is still out standing so for the time being I get the wiring loom out and and she how she fits. I made a bracket for the coils and attached that bracket to the top engine mounts (I fine peice of work that gave no injuries what so ever)

Bike guts

I may have mentioned I don't have much money so how was I going to get an engine?
Steal one? Nah my mother would kill me.
Make one? yeah right I can hardly make toast
Buy one? no money remember
Well it turns out my colleague has a dad who hoards stuff, old canoes, door locks, hats, banana skins any thing really and one very old very Rusty Honda CB125T, oh yeah. Engage sweet talk, walk home with most of a bike. Feeling very smug I start stripping the CB down with my new tools from the woman a screw fix.
Once the bike was stripped down. I kept the engine carbs and wiring loom. the rest went on eBay.
I've got my engine and loom, and even some pennies from the sale of the bits of CB. Of course I brought the boss some flowers to keep her sweet.

Suprisingly my Honda engine did not fit in the Kawasaki frame some a call to dad and some free mild steel was now mine along with a borrowed hack saw and some wise words of wisdom. Basically he said why you doing this, just get a bike on HP or go with out. So now with my determination fully recharged I cracked on with the engine mounts and back to screw fix for a drill and drill bits, then back to screw fit to swap the masonry bits for metal bits. I'm on first name terms with Wendy at screw fix. she also thinks I'm a knob.

The return

After the burns had healed from my hands and the cuts a gashes had mended I decided to give grinding another go. Another day off work. This time with gloves on! I did my best which was pretty good i think. Back in the car to screw fix to get some metal files. Cracked on with the frame as best i could. and now back to Adrian to weld the front and back. Its fits together like a child's jigsaw, not one for children mind you, one made by children. Adrian or what ever he wants to be called did a cracking job, its fantastic. Now however, its doesn't fit in my car! after some jiggling and poking its in and the boot shuts, some minor damage to the cars interior but I'll keep that secret.

Spend some money

I took a day off work and in the sunshine did a few mock ups to see what I was after, not that I really knew but I wanted to convince my self.

Like a said I've never done this before and as such learnt two things; firstly that the rear wheel bracket was on up side down and secondly that I don't have any tools!

I chucked the frame in the car and off I went to the sand blasters. Whilst he was doing his thing, what ever witch craft he does I went to screw fix to get me a grinder. I'm now learning the joys of power tool shopping. Sand magican has done is thing £20 later I'm back home. Its my day off, the neighbours are probably at work. The boss is also at work, the garden is mine to start grinding...... TV makes it looks so easy.

Here we go

I met this guy and he was in to old twin shock crossers, he had a thing for KX250's. He had an old frame lying around. So i got some oil and grim on my soft smooth office boy hands and went and spoke to him. I was like "yeah I build bikes", then managed to convince him i knew what i was doing and he gave me a frame, forks and an old tank, as i drove away he probably thought I was such a wanker; but hey, i got my first bits of bike. As i lived in a flat still my new frame lived on the balcony for a few months whilst we moved in to a house, my first garden but more importantly my first shed. Oh its a lovely place. it would be perfect if the boss hadn't made me have the tumble dryer in there!
So, i got a frame and then brought a hard tail kit from eBay, and that needed assembling. I got a guy called Adrian to weld the bits together, He knows nothing of bikes so i was like "Yeah i build bikes". again Adrian was probably not impressed. I paid him then found out his name was not Adrian at all, I'm such a knob.

Chapter one

I've riden, dropped, crashed and purchased many bikes in my relitivly short biking career,
(I say Career cos not sure what other word to use; I need one of those books about other words with lots of other words meanings, them fisauraus things) Any ways I digress.
There are no really nice bikes out there on the market except ones for silly money and I don't have much money. Having sold my bike I needed some thing. I had a Buell last and it was fantastic, riddled with faults and not designed for us tall fellas but even though it had faults its was great, so how am i going to get some thing I like as much as the buell. Simple I will try and build a bike. I had lego when I was young how hard can it be??? That was mistake number one.